Last night I went out for coffee with a friend, and we talked openly about whether we had ‘mommy’ or ‘daddy’ issues when it comes to relationships, sex and intimacy. It really got me thinking, and this morning just before waking, I had a dream illuminating this theme for me personally. My recent aversion to sex because it hasn’t been heart centred has led to a seeking to heal my sexuality, or at least sexual program that I run with my partner.
What’s really interesting is how I’ve been feeling drawn to tantra and I’ve been asking my higher self for guidance as to the “new sexual behaviour” of the golden age. Tantra is essentially moving sex up from the physical level, or the lower 3D chakras, to the heart centre. You then express high frequency love vibrations through sexual union with someone you love, without any broken psychological programs attached. No more sex for approval, no sex to fill a void, no sex to exert power or humiliation, no sex as a release of wasted creative energy or pent up frustration. Tantric sex can heal yourself, your partner, and even the planet of negative sexual programming, as the love released during Tantra sex can be energetically funneled into the planetary grid.
Tantra sex could just be the ‘thing’ that’s going to heal my ‘daddy issues’. Until last night I throught I had my daddy issues under control. Yet, I had failed to see how they had seeped into my sexuality and I was still running a program that I’d learnt as a kid.
When one of your parents rejects you, abandons you, takes their love away from you when you’re young, you absorb this emotionally as a program that you use to interpret other relationships. It’s a learned behaviour. Our parents constitute our first masculine and feminine role models, especially since as a society we’ve become so separated from Mother Earth and Father God. These less than perfect models then become our guiding compass for future relationships on an energetic level, which manifest as miasms or polarizations, or distorted subconsious programs.
For example: as a child, my father didn’t accept or approve of me, so in my teens, when I was establishing my own personality and relationships, when I wanted approval from other men, I would tap into my sexuality to have that need fulfilled. If I am honest with myself, I have not cleared this pattern. One of the reasons I press my partner for sex is to ‘feel’ intimate with him. This is absurd! In no way does our relationship lack intimacy, affection or tenderness. The act of sex has all these old paradigms attached to it, and that is why it has become outmoded and sporadic in our relationship. This paradigm needs to shift.
Why my self esteem (3rd chakra) is/was so tied up with my sexuality (2nd chakra) I think has to do with a holographic program instilled by exposure to media. Advertising images constantly teach that sex and social approval, or even self esteem and consumption are intertwined. The images work strong on a subconscious/emotional level, where these kinds of programs really ‘settle in’ and repeat themselves as a habit or energetic feedback loop. Some types of music, too, keep us locked into a 3D program with their deep bass beats (not to mention lyrics) that resonate with the 2nd sexual chakra and incite us to engage in promiscuious behaviour.
This low level programming explains addictions of almost any sort. Consumption of cigarettes, alcohol, food, and even shopping attempt to fill a void in our self esteem/ lack of self love, which stems from our not knowing our own divinity, our role in the universe, where we come from, and who we really are. The human species has for a long time been separated from our real divine roots through suppression of information! The healing of these distorted 2nd and 3rd chakra programs can only come from re-parenting. That is, re-establishing our realtionship to Father God and Mother Earth. Even 12 step programs for addiction address this issue, as giving over your power to a Higher Power is considered an essential step to staying sober, the very minimum for which requires you to cultivate belief in a higher power.
This is the new healing I am now undertaking to help all of us raise out of 3D and get us vibrating at a higher level. For all of you who have sexuality issues, 2nd and 3rd chakra polarizations, I am healing my own (through Tantra and other heart opening exercises) to help heal the 3D level programing that is plaguing all of us as a species and keeping us from knowing our true divine identity. I can do this because we are all connected, energetically and through our DNA.
This is perhaps the greatest gift of the ascension process. As we work on our own individual issues, we clear the way for others because we are all ONE. My healing can heal others. I am not useless, I am not alone, and I am not powerless. This is how we come to re-parent ourselves. Parents are compassionate. We can be compassionate to ourselves by acknowledging our value as individuals. At the same time, we can only truly understand our value as individuals by appreciating how special we all are as a species.
We are special because we all share one Spirit, that one spirit that directs the intelligence of the body, enables our heart to pump, our dna to reproduce, our lungs to breathe. This breath of life is our Father. And Earth, the vessel that holds and supports us all, is our Mother.
Thanks for reading,